tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5561644664649406401.post3343272471952136017..comments2023-04-23T07:09:41.748+03:00Comments on Empty Cradle, Empty Heart: Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10006477385560302312noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5561644664649406401.post-64078477316456485232011-04-27T23:09:32.616+03:002011-04-27T23:09:32.616+03:00there is a HUGE discrepancy between what family/fr...there is a HUGE discrepancy between what family/friends think and the reality. i was constantly shocked. people really think after a few months you should have moved on. frankly, that's absurd. i feel like after 6 months you should have a general sense that you are clawing your way out. by a year, you should be functional but by no means no longer sad.<br /><br />i discussed with a social worker my difficulties in "moving on" considering i had children. she said that honestly she finds that many women have a hard time finding nechama without another baby.<br /><br />yet i know there are cases of losses and there was no baby afterwards and they were able to find happiness again. in my mind i felt that i would have to go through menopause before i would come to terms with that reality. i found happiness before i was able to carry to term (4+ yrs) but i did feel like life was cloudy and gray.arijesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04054624664476807741noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5561644664649406401.post-28075834606947272252011-04-19T23:29:43.594+03:002011-04-19T23:29:43.594+03:00For how long does this continue? My family thinks...For how long does this continue? My family thinks I should be pretty much ready to move on. I can't see that happening for a long timeRachelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10006477385560302312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5561644664649406401.post-80598598743056308022011-04-17T19:36:04.770+03:002011-04-17T19:36:04.770+03:00the holidays are hard, too. a lot is hard. i was...the holidays are hard, too. a lot is hard. i was due erev pesach in 2005. we were at a seder with 40 of my relatives and i completely lost it after the second kos.<br /><br />i was also very thrown in the grieving process when i seemed to be doing better and then it would feel as awful as the beginning again. this happened a lot and i began to view it as waves and cycles that were not predictable, but the way the grief works. there are better moments and worse moments. days where you can see some light and days where it's as awful as it ever was and it seems like it will be that way forever. grief is an ocean and there are ebbs and flows.arijesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04054624664476807741noreply@blogger.com