I finally figured out why no one back home gets it.  No one saw me pregnant.  No one saw me during my breakdown.  To them, it never really happened.  She was never real so losing her was never real.  Something that isn't real can't really be all that bad so I should just consider it part of life "most women have miscarriages sooner or later" and move forward.

I think I am even more upset now that I understand it.