We are going out for our 13th anniversary tonight (although our anniversary is not until Friday).  I know I should be grateful for everything that I have received in those 13 years, but all I keep thinking is that I should have had to plan tonight around a 3 month old in a stroller.  Instead this morning I went for bloodwork again to see "how I am doing".  Got the results back and I have no idea what they mean.  I hate the stupid 2 week wait.

In any case, while I wish I could be looking back on all the good things of the last 13 years, Channah, a lovely home always full of guests, amazing friends and neighbours, better relationships with my family, Channah, living my childhood drream having made aliya, a closet full of gorgeous Israeli style clothing that I love, a husband who has stuck by me through thick and thin, star trek -like technology on my iphone, kosher grape flavoured Popsicle  Channah- the only think I can seem to focus on today is what God took away.

Maybe I really am too negative.